Monthly Archives: May 2014

Top 3 Things Marriage Has Taught Us

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NAIMA LETT – BLOG – HOLLYWOOD CHRISTIAN
Top 3 Things Marriage Has Taught Us
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KN014
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The Top 3 Things Marriage Has Taught Us (From HU to I Do!)
It’s 2014, and we’ve made it to 13, Fam! 13 Years of Marriage!

I’m not superstitious nor prone to numerology. There’s no triskaidekaphobia here (fear of #13), so you’ll have an impossible time convincing me that we’re unlucky. Au contraire, my friend! We’re elated. We’ve had countless adventures crammed into a decade plus three, and as my husband Kevin said this year, “The Best is Yet to Come!” I believe that, especially since we’ve known each other since we were freshmen at Howard University. (That photo above is on our senior college cruise. We were so young! Yes, I liked red then too. LOL!) So, we could call this the TOP 3 THINGS WE’VE LEARNED ABOUT MARRIAGE FROM HU TO I DO!

Top 3 Things We’ve Learned

As we reflect, I asked myself and then Kevin: “WHAT ARE THE TOP 3 THINGS MARRIAGE HAS TAUGHT YOU?” Here’s what we wrote separately:

Kevin
1. Patience
2. Perseverance
3. Greater hope

Naima
1. Patience
2. How to Love more fully
3. Not to take Life for granted

#1
Did you catch that? I had to laugh. We both immediately concluded that the #1 thing we’ve learned in 13 years of marriage is patience. Yep. Good, old-fashioned P-A-T-I-E-N-C-E, which is defined as “the capacity to accept delay, difficulty or suffering without getting upset.”

Why?
Kevin explains, “Because at some point we have to relinquish the desire for control or power to dictate outcomes. We don’t think the same way or respond the same way to given situations although we do often arrive at the same conclusion in our own timing. It takes patience for two people trying to live, learn and love as one to allow that process to occur naturally and organically without pretense or vain attempts to change each other for our own selfish pursuits.”

Couldn’t have said it better myself! Marriage includes daily deciding to unselfishly function as a team with the same name on the back of our jerseys. Our Lord chose marriage as the imagery to describe His relationship with us, His church. Wow-wee has He had patience with us! And doesn’t it seem like we learn more and more patience as we wait on and grow in Him?

What about you?

Whether married or not, we’re all in relationships. What have your years in relationships taught you? What’s the TOP THING that you’ve learned?

Have an outstanding Memorial Day Holiday weekend. Lots of love from a soon-to-be undisclosed beach up the coast from the LaLa,
Naima

Rev. Naima Lett, D.MIN, ABD
The Hollywood Christian®
Author of coming release Confessions of a Hollywood Christian®

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Beverly Hills Billionaire Problems

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NAIMA LETT – BLOG – HOLLYWOOD CHRISTIAN
Beverly Hills Billionaire Problems
© NaimaLett.com/blog


d_sterling


Wow.

If you don’t frequent celebrity news, you may have missed this week’s TMZ release of Beyonce’s sister Solange going all Rocky Balboa/Billy Banks on Beyonce’s husband Jay-Z in the infamous hotel elevator video after the Met Ball. Touché.

But there is NO WAY any of us could miss the ongoing LaLa Land soap opera starring Beverly Hills billionaire Donald Sterling, owner of the Los Angeles Clippers, who were eliminated from the NBA Playoffs by Oklahoma City Thunder last night.

Talk about problems.

Sterling’s response to his lifetime NBA ban and $2.5 million fine for racist comments recorded by personal assistant/alleged mistress V. Stiviano and leaked to TMZ Sports was to grant an exclusive, hour-plus-long CNN interview this week to Anderson Cooper from his Beverly Hills mansion right up the street. Bad idea.

Or brilliant idea…
…if your goal is to stay in the news cycle as long as possible. His “outrageous” comments had to then be rebutted by Magic Johnson and compared to Barbara Walter’s interviews with his estranged wife Rochelle and former girlfriend V. Stiviano. And it goes on and on and on.

Forbes just released an article referencing its first 1989 Sterling write-up by Dana Weschler who described Sterling as:

“He craves, nay, lusts to be a celebrity. In the last year scores of journalists across the country have received ‘personal’ notes from him praising one of their recent articles and offering them tickets to Clippers games. At one California newspaper, so many reporters received the letters that the office joke became displaying them on the bulletin board. If the reporters won’t bite, the advertising departments of the media will oblige. Two-page spreads filled with society photographs of Sterling appeared in a Beverly Hills newspaper in July. ‘Mr. and Mrs. Donald T. Sterling greet television star Barbara Eden,’ read one caption.”

Basketball Hall of Famer and former Los Angeles Clippers general manager Elgin Baylor, who sued Sterling in 2009 for employment discrimination, confirmed in a recent interview that Sterling indeed “likes the limelight, whether good or bad”.

So Why Are We?

So my question is, “Why are we giving the light to him?” Myself included.

It’s only been 2 weeks, and I’m already exhausted of Sterling, the reports of his unscrupulous dealings, discrimination lawsuits, and this expanding cast of attention-seeking characters. Problem is that this story is just gearing up. There will be legal fights and more audio recordings leaked. It’s NO accident that the first tape was leaked while the Clippers were in the Playoffs. This story wouldn’t have nearly as much juice without Clippers players turning their jerseys backwards and folks trying to figure out how an African American coach feels about playing for a racist owner.

This will likely be the only post I address this, because for me, it’s the principle of the thing. This ain’t light, Fam. There are so many other wonderful milestones we’re celebrating this month: graduations, anniversaries, birthdays, reunions. There are folks out here ‘letting their light shine before others, that they may see their good deeds and glorify our Father in heaven.’ Matt 5:14-16. I’d rather rejoice in those things.

Problem Solver

And in the case of our Beverly Hills billionaire, I think we can all follow Magic’s suit and lift up prayers for true repentance and transformation. Let’s be clear: the root of racism, pride and greed is sin, and there is only one Person I know who forgives sin. Perhaps our Jewish brother Sterling, who once changed his name from Tokowitz, will have an encounter with our Jewish LORD and yearn to love and treat others better.

I’m reminded of a quote I heard recently from another Beverly Hills resident who lives not far from Sterling, Denzel Washington: “You never see a UHAUL behind a hearse. I’ve been blessed to make hundreds of millions of dollars in my life. I can’t take it with me. Neither can you. It’s not how much we have, but what you DO with what you have. And we all have different gifts… Use it. Share it. That’s what counts…”

It’s not how much we have, Fam. It’s what we do with it. Instead of undercutting folks and discriminating because of race and using our wealth to solely push forward our agenda to gain media exposure and fame, let’s find ways to use and share our gifts with others. That’s what counts.

On that note, I’m off to celebrate a USC Masters graduate today (Go Drea!). This time next year that’ll be me at BIOLA/TALBOT.

Lots of love from the LaLa,
Naima

Rev. Naima Lett, D.MIN, ABD
The Hollywood Christian®
Author of coming release Confessions of a Hollywood Christian®

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Me & My Mom

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NAIMA LETT – BLOG – HOLLYWOOD CHRISTIAN
ME & MY MOM
© NaimaLett.com/blog

M0MSDAY
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MY MOM…

went to our heavenly home when I was a sophomore at Howard University (cancer). I subsequently spent a lot of time staring at a younger photo of her (above)… not because I missed her immensely, though that was true; but mostly I was trying to find some trace of myself in there somewhere – in her eyes, her smile.

I had just turned 20 years old, and I was still forming my own identity, regardless of what my husband Kevin would say, whom I met at 18. Hear him tell it, I was pretty confident back then. “Bold” is the term he used.

But I didn’t feel very bold that year. I teetered somewhere between auto-pilot numb and verge-of-tears fragile. Only an encounter with the Lord Himself put me on a path towards okay-ness.

My dad reminded me a lot that as time passed, things would get better. So true. The grief (Thank God for grief counseling!) eventually gave way to acceptance and peace. I still miss my mom, but it’s not painful anymore. I look forward with joy and anticipation to dancing and singing with her again some day and hearing her laugh! That laugh lit up many a’rooms and lifted countless burdens. She’s electric!

FUNNY THING

And the funny thing is when the grief lifted, I could see clearly. I had matured. I was very much my own woman, but I looked at Mama’s photo one day, and I could finally see the resemblance – the same shape eyes, nose, chin. Same height and build. Actually, at my age, she was smaller than me. I tried to put on her wedding dress and couldn’t fit. LOL!

WE LOOK TO YOU, MOM

Why was it so important for me to see myself in my mother’s eyes? Because from the time I was born, she helped me see who I was. I believed I could be and do anything because she started telling me so when I was still in diapers. I grew to be confident (okay… Bold!) because she was bold, and I walked in her 8.5 size heels (same size). She was a leader and a straight-shooter, and I’m told I picked that up along the way. And when I needed to find my eternal identity in Christ, the path was made easier because Mom & Dad had always pointed us to Him.

What am I saying? We look to you, Moms. As children, we see ourselves in you, first, and we believe what you say, and even more so, what you do. If you are fearless, we learn fearlessness. If you’re honest, we learn honesty. If you say we’re beautiful or handsome, and treat us as such, we believe you. Now, we’ll all go through that awkward-gotta-figure-things-out-for-ourselves phase, but we’ll bounce back a lot quicker if you’ve laid a solid foundation of truth that we never forget.

THANK YOU

Whether you’ve just turned 71 (Happy Birthday to You!) or you’re a new mommy at 31, please know how very influential you are in the lives of your children. We look to you and need you. We honor you and we celebrate you. Thank you for helping to shape who we are. Thank you especially for your love. We love you.

Happy Mother’s Day!
Naima

And if you’re in the LaLa this Sunday, we’re honoring moms at Hope in the Hills. RSVP today.

Rev. Naima Lett, D.MIN, ABD
The Hollywood Christian®
Author of coming release Confessions of a Hollywood Christian®

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